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Letters I've received from various persons regarding this site! More mail is encouraged... tell me about your social experiments! These aren't whole letters, but merely pertinent excerpts.
FROM JEFF
Jeff's Project: "I've decided that within a week or two I'm going to change my status from"single" to "in a relationship" on FB and see what reactions I get both online and offline. Allowing only a few people I'm close to, to help fuel the fire by being in on the experiment."
Jeff's Hypothesis: "I think some of the people I'm pretty close with will fill up the post with comments like "oh my god who is she!?" and things to that effect. What will really sell it, is if I tell 2-3 people to post things like "she's the prettiest smartest girl ever" then I'll get the real jealous girls to come out. Part of me thinks that I'll have more random phone calls and text messages from everyone who will want to "see what I'm up to" and then ease into what my love life is like. it almost feels evil! ;P You have to understand that I'm pretty used to hearing things from these girls that are to the effect of, I love you too much to hurt you, which in turn is a bit of a contradiction. I'm always told that any girl I end up with, they'll be jealous of, the thing is I never get the full relationship. It always falls short. So what I'm really curious to see is, just how truthful is everyone really being. I want to see what happens when they find out I'm no longer just a phone call away. I have a feeling the results are going to be pretty interesting and I'm looking forward to being pleasantly surprised no matter what they churn up. I'll e:mail you everything that happens. I'm waiting for the perfect opportunity. I'm thinking in about 2-3 weeks or so, that will give me enough time to plan how I want this to happen."
2011 - January 12
"My name is Jeff, 18. Kansas City, KS. I just stumbled across your site and I absolutely love it, you need more content though!!! The reason I'm writing you is because, I was originally researching some ideas for a social experiment regarding Facebook.
I'm told I've always had a "secret fan club" of sorts haha. [= anyways, an ex of mine told me just a few days ago she wants to be *ahem* "friends with benefits." I agreed, but only because I really really care for her. Amazingly enough, I'm not real interested in sex. She tells me like 2 days ago that her ex begged her back. She didn't really mention anything about our "agreement."
I bring this up, because, I've been offered this quite a few times. They want sex, they don't want a relationship. I've decided that within a week or two I'm going to change my status from"single" to "in a relationship" on FB and see what reactions I get both online and offline. Allowing only a few people I'm close to, to help fuel the fire by being in on the experiment."
2011 - January 29
"I'm actually about to change the status today. After a series of events these past few days, I feel today is the day. I'm starting to re-evaluate what might happen, I might be completely pushed aside by everyone. Ignored. It's anyone's guess now. But I don't want to put if off any longer. It's time to get started! I'm not even sure how long I'll keep it up. I think I'll just go for the feel of things. Well, here it goes! Wish me luck."
2011 - February 3
"Well it's been 5 days. I figure I'll let you know what's happening'.
****For reference; anytime someone specifically asks me who my girlfriend is, I say "it's no one" I'm not lying, it's clever, I don't have to remember any fake names, I don't look stupid or crazy when one day everyone finds out "she's not real" haha and I think I get better results when I say it too. True colors start to fly.****
The night before I change my status I stayed up texting my friend Megan. I was dropping flirtatious hints like bombs and she chose to disregard them for whatever reason. Short of asking her if we could be boyfriend/girlfriend she was going to ignore anything I'd say. It bothered me a lot.
Sooo, it's the next day, and I change it around 10am-ish. About 30-60 mins go by and Megan texts me.
Megan: hola coma estas?
Me: muy bien! T tu?
Megan: bien. Who are you dating?
Me: no one (:
Megan: ok lol
-end of conversation-
I haven't heard from her since.. =/
That night I got a call 2am. I woke up, saw I missed the call from my friend Ashley, called her back at 2:40am. She was yelling at me asking who I was going out with, why I hadn't said anything to her when I talked with her previously on the phone. I kept saying no one, but until I told her I was doing an experiment, she wouldn't let up. I told her not to say anything to anyone, just to go along with it.
My sister texted me asking me. When she came over 2 days ago she asked me who it was. (My family and I were hanging out together) then everyone started to interrogate me. My 2 sisters, 1 brother in law, and my mother. Everyone taking a stab at who it was and why I wouldn't tell them. Naming off my exes, a few of my friends.
They were all extremely upset I wouldn't tell them. They stopped for awhile when they came to the conclusion "he doesn't want us getting into his personal life and if he doesn't want us to know anything then that's fine." My bro-in-law texts my friend Aaron whom calls me asking me if I had already began my experiment.
So I leave the room and my sister Jessica broke down into tears because "I don't understand why he won't tell me who it is. It's not a big deal. It's not like I'm gonna say or do anything to anyone, I just wanna know. I thought we were closer than this!"
We haven't spoken since....
The next morning, my mother made me pinky promise her that she wouldn't say anything to anybody if I told her. >_< I told her it really was no one. Then plainly told her I'm doing an experiment. And everyone's apart of it.
My friend Taylor texted me, it was a stupid conversation. I felt like she was waiting for me to say something. She never asked me about a girlfriend or hinted about it. However yesterday or the day before my friend Aaron received a text asking about who my girlfriend was. My friend Aaron and I haven't been close lately. I feel even though I let him in on what I was doing, he's still apart of this experiment..
I expected Taylor to get ahold of me when Aaron told me he'd keep saying "no one." But yet? She never did. Which leads me to believe he told her. And I think if he did, he'd do it to make me look stupid or bad in some way, because he's extremely competitive with me over EVERYTHING. He has this compulsive need to be better at life or something. Anyways, he was a real dick when we last spoke. So I'm still waiting to find out what's happening there.
I haven't heard from either one of them since...
As far as Facebook, someone I haven't met, but have talked with a little bit, "liked" it and told me congrats. I took opportunity to say some things I wanted the girls to read. Then my friend Lacey, texted me, didn't ask who, but told me she was "really happy for me" and "she had better be good enough for me."
My ex Kenlee, has tried texting me twice. I've wrote her back, and we talked normally. She hasn't mentioned me and a girlfriend at ALL.
Off the top of my head that's it. I feel I have talked with FAR less people since it changed. It hasn't even been a week, but I see where this is going and it's pretty depressing. My status' haven't said anything about a girlfriend, or being in love, going out on dates. I don't want to sound crazy to myself haha but either everyone is mad/upset/ignoring me or they haven't heard or (the latterfold) they don't care.
I'm not sure what to think yet. I can't say I'm too surprised because I did call this ahead of time. But like I said, it hasn't even been a full week. So I'm ready to see this play out some more. If I lose some friends over someone who doesn't even exist, I guess they're not friends."
2011 - February 18
" Well, to wrap this all up. I've concluded my friends don't like me when I'm in a relationship. When I changed it to single I got reacquainted with everyone. It's pretty pitiful. So I don't know? Kinda hard to explain their behavior. Maybe there's something I'm not seeing."
When my friends come out of a relationship, they usually come to me and tell me about it. They're seeking reassurance and comfort, it's almost always some long term relationship they're in. I'm not one to get ahold of people, people get ahold of me. I give everyone I talk to my 100% attention and when they're horrible at talking, I try to carry on the conversation as best as I can.
Which is why I could tell something was wrong when people stopped getting ahold of me. It wasn't like I was ignored really, I made a point to not be the first to initiate conversation with others. There were a few days I was really going crazy because no one had talked with me. I've never ignored anyone because they were suddenly taken. If I have, it would've been something subconscious.
It usually happens that the person who's 'taken' tends to block others out because they can get so focused on pleasing their partner, they forget to talk with others. Orrrr they're afraid of being caught talking with me (boyfriend theory)
I'm kinda surprised, because I remember when I very first thought up the idea, I figured everyone would get really jealous and would blow up my phone. That sort of... "saving silverman" kinda thing. Maybe I should've milked having the greatest hottest smartest girlfriend ever? I noticed when I changed it back to "single" my ex was the only one to comment. She said, "you had a girlfriend? Lol" I replied "that's what it said" and nothing else was said.
I'm not sure what I've learned yet.. It's not such a great feeling to know if I found someone I'd want to fill my time up, that my friends wouldn't want to fight for even the slightest of my attention. Or it could be a great thing in disguise? I guess I'll never realllllly know how everyone's reaction was since I don't have cameras planted at their computers.
FROM CHRISTOPHER
Christopher was the first person to ever write me a note (and share an experience)! Fascinating man.
2009 - November 5th
"Hello my name is Christopher, and I have recently become infatuated with social experiments. I am intrigued by your website and your willingness to talk to people you don't know. I guess I love hearing new stories, but they are always immensely more better in person. I have tried a few experiments out lately.
I don't know if this qualifies, but I will give it a go. Recently, I sent a letter to my pen-pal Ingrid. Usually I attach postage, however this time
I decided to tape on the correct coinage and see if it works. I sent two letters actually, one with correct postage and the coin letter. It worked!
The one with coins actually came faster then the correct letter. They had also left the coins on, making it essentially free. Also, postage stamp is
supposed to pay for a one ounce letter, but with the addition of coins it would add a couple of ounces to the letter. I am surprised it worked, but
went through the hands of many people. It was like committing a crime and everyone helped you along the way.
Another one, this last week I went to my college library....with my typewriter. I had two cameramen in secret positions. I typed in the middle of the library for a whole ten minutes interrupted. Finally after that period someone finally confronted me, quite rude actually, but understandable. See I live in the midwest and people are more reserved with their actions, I wanted to see how far I could take it."
2009 - November 6th
"Reverse Junk Mail: Today I saw a link about reverse junk mail that my friend sent me. I obliged him knowing that this would be worth my time, because I am about all things mail nowadays. Anyway, on the website they suggested on there that you can take the reply envelopes (in the junk mail), the ones with prepaid postage, attach it to a package and it will be sent to the company of origin. I hopped on board that ship right away. I found an old text book of mine called "Small Business for Dummies"(Irony). I placed this in a makeshift brown cardboard shipping box stuffed with old business week papers and taped the prepaid envelope on the outside and did some reverse
junk mail. I don't know if it will work, but I suppose it will be an indirect way of getting rid of my garbage."
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